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A quick self-love check:
- Do you talk about yourself in a respectful way? Or are you a “shitty writer who writes crap”? I’ve seen it a lot on Twitter and honestly, it’s an instant turn off for me as a reader. If I got a chance to choose between two authors: “an aspiring novelist yet to debut” and “just a weirdo writing nonsense”, who do you think I’d choose? Learn to respect yourself so that others can respect you!
- Do you approach your craft in a respectful way? Are you proud of what you have written today? If someone asked them to show you your writing, would you do it? Or not, because it’s “trash” and “they’d drop it after three minutes”?
- Do you accept compliments about your writing? If someone tells you that they are really looking forward to reading the rest of the story, do you believe them? If someone tells you that they really like some characters you created, do you respond by saying you hate them?
- Does the idea of becoming famous scare you? If it was to happen tomorrow, would you feel prepared? Or would you cringe from fear in the corner of your room, calling the therapist, because you are afraid of others “discovering” you are a big failure?
- Do you allow yourself to commit mistakes? Or are you an “all-or-nothing” thinker, who doesn’t accept failure? Are you open about some mistakes you’ve made in the past, like not gathering the audience before publishing or signing up a poor contract? Are you able to move on and open a new page? Do you give yourself new chances?
- Do you work at your relationships being harmonious? Do you check your family and friends? Do you accept social invitations? If you needed help, do you have could trusted to call? If you needed to launch a big fundraiser, do you have people you can rely on? If you got sick, is there someone who will stick up with you no matter what?
- Do you take good care of your body? Writing is a sedentary job. You spend a lot of time in closed spaces, maniacally drinking coffee and probably operating under stress. It’s not very healthy. Do you eat well and exercise regularly? Do you visit the doctor if you need to?
- Do you take breaks from writer’s job? Does your free time equal writing time? Do you ever take breaks from writing, editing, creating content, interacting with audience etc.? What about your other hobbies and passions?
- Do you reward yourself for your writing successes? Do keep track of your newest achievements? Do you celebrate reaching new milestones? Do you take short holidays to refuel?
- If you realized that you don’t really love yourself as a writer, what can you do to change this? I’m leaving you with this question, as I believe that you already know where you are lacking self-love as an author.